As many of you know I am intense. My mom told me the other day that I am a warrior. I kept thinking about that today. My warriorness was rising to the surface and I wasn't sure what to do with it. As I go through all these stages of thinking about what is going on with Rachel I am learning so many different things. One of those things is patience... even more than that really, it's waiting on the Lord that I am practicing. This involves giving up control of the future. This really conflicts with my natural tendency to fight for what I think is right. Fighting implies some sense that I can change things... which is hard to do when I am trying to release control. I struggle because I know part of my role is to advocate for Rachel, but what does that look like. I have been feeling an urge to rise up against some stuff I don't agree with in this situation (to be even more complicated it is the piece involving the agency I work for). The things is, I wonder if it would really do any good, or if I would just be a kicking screaming foster baby. Maybe I am suppose to be using prayer and faithfulness as my sword and shield. On the flip side, God gave me this feisty spirit, and good communication skills for a reason. I don't want to stand back when I should be saying something. AAAAAAAAAHHHHH! This feels like the story of my whole life. This is the personality trait that is my greatest strength and weakness.
How do I know what I am supposed to be doing here?
3 comments:
Great Haircut! - Matt
Is that a new haircut or is your hair pulled back? I am sure these are the comments you are hoping to receive! You are a warrior and to that I snap my hands in your face and say with attitude, "OH no you didn't!"
I was going to ask the same thing--hair cut? It's cute! You guys both look cute!!
Email me sometime--you're not the only one who likes grown-up talk sometimes! :-)
--Dianna
ericdianna@hotmail.com
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